Good morning. hello. Ouch ouch ouch. How do you people do this whole “living in a society” thing when you’re old. I am in such pain. I am not cut out for going 3, 4 nights a week anymore, It is amazing and wonderful and lethal. I am death, hung over father, destroyer of farts. Thank god that I have Jane tonight and I have to stay in.
Jane, by the way, is awesome and every day she sleeps in a little bit longer. Summer is going to be so awesome.
Let’s see.. Last night Sean and I went to the Sinclair and saw the first show in the current leg of the Young Fathers tour. They were amazing, but also kinda boring. I can’t put my finger on it. it was really weird. It might have been the lack of banter. Do not sleep on banter.
If you’re thinking to yourself “that’s not such a crazy night out,” you are right. Except after the show we went to Highland Kitchen and met up with the Taylors, Eric, Erin, Richard, and I met a few nice people including the manager of the Paradise. That was great, a solid night out, except then Sean and Abby and I decided we had to go to Man Ray. Which was awesome. And we ran into Yale. I did not, however, meet up with the owner about my night on Friday, but I did see the promo on the screens, so that was very exciting. Obligatory Real Wild Child plug here. I am strting to think this thing might be a big success. It is going to be insane.
And, I mean, two bars and a live show is enough to do in a night, right? Yeah, it is. Except then we went to the Druid, and at the Druid I met a guy who was in December Sound! Remember me ranting about December Sound like two weeks ago? The one dude rambling on about December Sound in 2024 running into a dude in December Sound. Magic. The world is magic.
Alfalfa. Remember when we all ate a ton of alfalfa? What happened to alfalfa? Do people still eat it?
All right, let’s see. I promised Eric and Abby I’d insert some politics here. We have figured out the president/vice president ticket that can heal the nation. You are not going to like it, but it is 100% true: The Rock and Guy Fieri. They would clean up on an election, and pretty much everyone would be comfortable voting for them. I would vote for The Rock and Guy Fieri in a fucking heartbeat if it meant beating Donald Trump. Also their ads could just say something like “I dunno, man. We’ll just hire good people to worry about that.”
We also talked about the possibility of Jose Andres taking the place of Guy Fieri but I suppose he’s, like, woke now or something. Also Jose Andres should win the Nobel Prize. What an inspiration.
Oh also I invented a new drink at Man Ray I am going to be a bajillionaire are you ready? BEER SHOT. It’s all the taste and booze of a beer without the water. When you don’t want to switch to hard alcohol., but you are full. BEER SHOT.
This, of course, reminds me of the incident where I had this brilliant idea to melt four Kit Kat BIG KATS together to make a single GIANT KIT KAT. And then the next day 9/11 happened. You get too lost in your world of minutiae and absurdity and then the real world comes roaring back and makes you feel like an ostritch. And I have already been completely ripshit about the WCK attack and I don’t really know how we all keep functioning as human beings in a world like this. It’s just insane. Ethiopa got hungry and we did Do They Know its Christmas. The Gaza “famine” is larger than the Ethiopian famine and it all happened in less than a year instead of three years, but we got nothing, and even if you try and “donate” the odds are Netanyahu will keep the aid from getting to them anyway. Some fucker that we gotta vote for to keep fascism from happening and the world crumbling while it crumbles anyway and boy I sure don’t understand why people are gung ho for RFK or not voting. It is fucking bullshit and it would be nice if Biden gave us one single small reason to vote for him besides “fascism sux.”
Oh also that “fly like an eagle” song came on at Highland Kitchen and it reminded me of when the Postal Service used to use that song in its ads. That’s the actual Postal Service, not the band. Eric was confused on this topic.
It’s crazy how Bluey and his family have that house on that hill and they never talk about it and all their friends pretend it’s totally normal that they have such a good view.
Hey why do lawyers say “revert” when they mean “regroup?” Is that just my lawyers? Like a firm-specific thing? Is it a sector-specific thing? Like only corporate lawyers say it? Or do all lawyers say it. Do, like, immigration lawyers say it? Lawyers at the innocence project? Do I need to ask every lawyer I know this question? Frank? Friendly Beth? Do you have the answers?
Yesterday was April 3rd, a date which holds an outsized importance in my life because a) it is the birthday of my amazing ex girlfriend Jamie, hi Jamie, I miss you, love you, and b) it is the date of the Galaxie 500 show at the BU Walter Brown Arena in 1991. It was their last show in Boston, their second-to-last show ever, and the only time I ever got to see them and they were so bored but it was so great and Naomi stood center stagee, lit from behind, and she ruled so much and also they were opening for the Cocteau Twins who were also awesome and man Heaven or Las Vegas is a great album and also I hooked up with this girl Lorraine, except I had a girlfriend, and I wrote about it in my journal and then my girlfriend read my journal and it was one of those instances where someone did something immoral (reading the journal) but learned about something more immoral (hooking up with Lorraine) and you pretend to be outraged about the lessor immoral act but secretly you know the greater immoral act takes precedence and the whole thing is really a measure of your maturity and I am happy to say that even at the age of 19 I knew that it was indefensible to pretend to be outraged about the journal part of the disagreement and I just owned up to the infidelity part. I THINK we survived this incident, iirs, but we did not last much longer. One of the few exes I don’t talk to. She was rad.
That was such a good run-on sentence this hangover rules.
Okay I gotta go I am not 100$ functioning at the moment.
Today’s Media of the Day is.. Oh man the Veldt are touring with Ringo Deathstarr that is going to be amazing. I do not have a media of the day I guess. Do I?
Nope. I don’t. Being part of a society is killing me. I am spent.
There are many reasons to vote for Biden beyond “fascism sux.” (Abortion rights hello??) Also, “fascism sucks” is not something to downplay— it’s pretty much the most important issue there is. Don’t be a cynical asshole.
In terms of the “politics“ thing, did I already share this with you?
“Democrats have a better option than Biden”
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-ezra-klein-show/id1548604447?i=1000645559771