Good morning. Hello. How are you? #1072
Alien lore questions, memento mori from the cemetery, a new theory of lifelong friendships
All right well here it is December 27th. Nick and Meghan and Henry have just left, headed back to NC. Jussi went back upstairs. We are alone in our apartment! It was sad to see the friends go, but it is all very exciting, because that means… chores! So much to do in this new apartment. We got the projector hooked up last night and we all got to watch Prometheus which was fun. Emily and Abby and Al and Ivelise came too. Who doesn’t love grody alien goo at yuletide.
The lore of the Alien franchise makes no sense and I kinda like that. Lotta mystery there still. Especially when you factor in the Predator movies being somehow in the same universe, then things really make no sense. Is David responsible for it all? Then how does that Antarctica film make any sense? I used to think I was just not paying enough attention but after having rewatched Prometheus and Alien Covenant last night, nope. It’s not me. Shame, too, because it’s a pretty interesting world in general. I would especially like to know what happened to Earth in the 21st century in this franchise.
We also went to Mt. Auburn Cemetery for a lovely walk yesterday. Which was a big change from the day before, not having left the couch. Ten or so of us, two toddlers, trundling through the tombstones. Got to look at all the headstones and crypts and graves and Mary Baker Eddy had the biggest grave and that just seems a little excessive for the founder of a religion. I feel like there should be a bit more humility there, even though I suppose the religious followers and the religion itself were the ones to go hog wild on building her such a giant mausoleum. We will find the grace in our heart to forgive her.
Then we went to a diner and it was delicious and gosh darny darn darn New England diners are just spiffing. I had chicken pot pie, or half of one anyway. Emma had pancakes and they were delicious. A+ experience. Makes me miss our non-diner diner in Chapel Hill that closed during covid. There is another non-diner diner but it moved during COVID so it’s not in the same place so it doesn’t have that warm nostalgic glow. I’d never been to this Deluxe Town Diner in… um… I’ma gonna say Arlington? Never been there before, it was swell.
Driving back via Apple Maps from Arlington to Somerville takes you through Cambridge and all residential stuff and tons of old, beautiful houses all decked out in lights. Well, some of them. Somerville decks out their houses in lights more than the posh part of Cambridge, but gee whizz those houses are nice. Probably, what? $5, $6 million at this point? And still barely any yard and parking. But shit, they look cool.
Lot more Rivians up here than in Chapel Hill but way fewer Teslas and way fewer EVs in general, that is interesting. Suspect it has to do with the prevalence of street parking, which is obviously Still A Thing with EVs. Still have not seen a single Lightning this trip. Did see a Studebaker though.
Nick and I did some errands in the daytime, hitting up a new dispensary in Somerville (thanks for the free shirt!) and getting Emma some groceries. We discussed our various metaphors for marriage and love: mine I have said many-a-time before: falling in love is like a headache. Take some aspirin and let it pass, and don’t go ruining your marriage over it. Nick’s is that it’s like a financial portfolio and you can’t be dumping your money into meme stocks. Thick and thin, sickness and in health and all that. Marriage. Marriage.
Made two separate trips to the hardware store yesterday in the journey to getting the projector mounted on the ceiling. I think a lot about people who live in minimalist houses. Whenever Emma and I get a new abode (I think this is the… fourth in our relationship? Not counting the last solo place we each lived back when we first started dating) we immediately have to fill it with so many things that seem just purely functional: drills and socket sets and toasters and cutting boards and dish racks and I mean do those people who say they don’t own things, maaaaan, do they not own drills? Do things like this not count as “stuff?” Where is the line? If a screwdriver isn’t stuff is a Dewalt Driver? How many knives are you allowed to own and still be minimalist? How many forks? How many children’s plates and magnets for your fridge and are you allowed to put your kid’s drawings on the fridge or is that too maximalist and indicative of a cluttered mind? Is there some Minimalist Manifesto for the Modern American that can answer me these questions so I can slowly pick it apart like I did with Marie Kondo, that m-fer who told me I did not need to own books?
I had a minimalist friend back in college and right after college. I remember going to his house here in Boston (well, Cambridge) and he had nothing but a matress in his bedroom, a little stack of 3-4 books and a small pile of clothes. But I really fucked up. I didn’t look in his kitchen. Were his silicone spatulas breeding like mine were?
I miss that guy. He was a good influence. Drowned in a canoe in a lake in a storm. His funeral was Shaker and it was one of the most moving things I’ve seen. He was a good guy.
Kids and no kids separate grown adult friends, but so does how much death they’ve experienced.
Oh speaking of, I have a new theory of adult friendships that started as kid friendships: we’re all getting freaking weirder and weirder, more and more inflexible, and all in slightly different ways, so that it makes it weirder and weirder for now-adult friends to spend much time together. Yesterday after the cemetery walk, Emily said they were thinking we should all go this diner. “I dunno,” I said. “I overheard you guys say ‘if we can get in,’ and I have a rule I don’t go anywhere where you quote might be able to get in.” It’s true! I do have this rule. After some explaining that it was going to be fine, I consented to go, but man I am just an old adult friend who’s gotten weird in different ways from my other old adult friends, who have all gotten weird in other weird ways and we all struggle to get along and hang out and have fun and you can do it and it is awesome but also we are all breaking a bajillion rules to hang out now which is just hilarious.
But we all need this. It is what keeps us nimble and spry. You can be thrilled to go back to your cocoon afterwards, but you gotta keep doing it. Because friends rule, and you need to be there for them.
They are not always super psyched to have to be at Daddy Jane Dance Party though. But hey. Now my friends understand the pain of having to watch the “Look What You Made Me Do” and “Me!” videos every night. They share that pain with me now, they are performing their friend duties. And I thank them for it.
And man, my daughter was so happy to have so many people keep her company through DDJP.
Oh man I gotta make a playlist crap. Hold please. OMG yes. I already had a moody and quiet one done. Fantastic. Made it last week at home. Whew. It’s a good’un too.
Only four more playlists and then we are DONE.
You take care of yourself, y’hear?
yo, deluxe town diner is my neighborhood, in watertown!